You're Not Imagining It.
If you've noticed changes in your child since they started using social media, you're not alone. Thousands of families across the country are seeing the same thing. Research confirms what many parents already sense: social media platforms are designed in ways that can harm young people.
This page is a starting point, not a scare tactic. Here's what we know, what to look for, and what you can do.
What the Research Shows
Average time U.S. teens spend on social media daily, not including video games or streaming services.
Common Sense MediaAverage number of times teens check their phones daily, primarily driven by social media notifications.
Common Sense MediaPercentage of 13-17 year-olds who use at least one social media platform.
Pew Research CenterTeens who use social media more than 3 hours daily face triple the risk of depression and anxiety compared to non-users.
JAMA PediatricsPercentage of teen girls who said Instagram made them feel worse about their bodies, according to Meta's own internal research.
Facebook Internal Research via WSJ Facebook FilesWarning Signs to Watch For
Every child is different, but these patterns may indicate social media is having a negative effect. None of these alone is cause for alarm, but several together may warrant a conversation.
Behavioral Changes
- • Becoming secretive about phone use or getting upset when asked about it
- • Checking phone compulsively, including first thing in the morning and last thing at night
- • Withdrawing from family activities or in-person friendships
- • Losing interest in hobbies or activities they used to enjoy
Emotional & Physical Signs
- • Increased anxiety, sadness, or irritability, especially after using their phone
- • Sleep problems or staying up late on devices
- • Sudden changes in body image, eating habits, or self-esteem
- • Expressing that they feel left out, not good enough, or comparing themselves to others online
What You Can Do
1. Start a conversation, not a confrontation
Ask your child what they enjoy about social media and what bothers them. Listen without judgment. Many teens know social media affects them but feel they can't stop because everyone else is on it.
2. Set boundaries together
Agree on phone-free times (meals, bedtime, homework) and phone-free zones (bedrooms at night). Use built-in screen time tools on iOS and Android. Rules work better when kids help create them.
3. Delay social media access
The U.S. Surgeon General has warned that 13 is too young for social media. Many child development experts recommend waiting until at least 16. There's no rush.
4. Learn how the platforms work
Understanding features like infinite scroll, algorithmic recommendations, and notification systems helps you have informed conversations. See how apps are designed →
5. Get help if needed
If your child is struggling, you are not alone and help is available. Call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) anytime. Talk to your child's pediatrician or school counselor.
Families Are Fighting Back
Over 2,325 lawsuits have been filed against social media companies, alleging their platforms were designed to be addictive and harmful to children. These cases are consolidated in a federal multidistrict litigation (MDL 3047) and the first trials are underway.
Helpful Resources
Common Sense Media
Age-based ratings and reviews for apps, games, and platforms.
Center for Humane Technology
Research and resources on how technology affects wellbeing.
NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness)
Support, education, and advocacy for families affected by mental illness.
Fairplay
Advocacy organization protecting children from commercial exploitation.
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